So it looks like we may have secured free lodging at a South Carolina island for the end of June/beginning of July. Bo can come with us which is the real bonus. As much as we’ve wanted to get away, we have no one to take care of Bo. He’s not your regular dog… he’s a bit like a baby. Yes, we are guilty of anthropomorphising, whatever. The best news is we will be back before Blobfest!

How do you negotiate a free rental? Make friends with rich people. It’s true! My mom’s best friend has been trying to get us to stay at her place for years but we always felt it wasn’t right. This time, I don’t think any of us care if it’s right or not. We need to get away. Walking the beach and watching the ocean may be just what the doctor ordered.

I am doing better. A bit. There are times when I am consumed by a deep anger that makes me want to take up kickboxing again just so I can smash some faces in… and then there are other times when I feel peaceful and grateful for how things worked out.

My biggest challenge is focusing on what I want and not re-living the crap that I went through. Rather than re-playing my last two interactions with Pookie over and over in my mind, I need to concentrate on the type of man I want in my life. The one thing I need to determine is where do healthy, well-adjusted, single men in the 38-42 age range, who are not afraid of commitment, congregate? Grief Counseling for Widowers? Single Father Support Groups?

This was always my problem in the past. They are out there… but where? And before anyone suggests it, I am going to hold off on online dating until I have to do it. The men on those sites are jerks and if there is a good one in their midst, I don’t have the patience to sift through the garbage. Besides, I am questioning my ability to tell good eggs from bad eggs.

At any rate, I am looking forward to our upcoming vacation. I can’t wait to get away from the world.

I survived Reunion Weekend! Friday night at Kelly’s was pretty amazing. I counted 8 RSVPs. Imagine my surprise when 20 girls showed up! One of the girls took me aside and said, “Donna, do you remember when we were Interpretive Dance together?”

“Yeah, that was back when I was doing my Isadora Duncan THANG!”

“I doubt you remember this but the one day, we were trying to get into the spirit of Miriam Makeba and I looked over at you and you had such an intense look on your face… well, I sketched you… and I brought it to show you.”

And from out of her bag she produces a framed drawing OF ME! Blew me away! I actually do kinda remember her sketching me.

Here’s a video of Miriam… imagine a group of white girls doing a series of “jazz hands” to this and you’ll have a pretty accurate idea of Interpretive Dance at Rosemont.

Yeah, not too much different than this:

The Gala on Saturday was less attended… only 5 girls showed up! Our 15 year class picture is going to look pretty pathetic! Oh well. It was lovely being at Rosemont again and amongst old classmates. I felt my dad’s spirit there with me. He was so instrumental getting me to go to Rosemont and he loved it as much as I did. There were a couple points I choked back tears because I could just close my eyes and go back to the Father/Daughter Luncheon or moving in day or any of the times he was there helping me. Dammit I miss him.

I am not feeling that much better, today. No excuses. I have work that needs to get done. And tonight is the kick off of Rosemont’s Reunion Weekend. I have a feeling I am going to be talking about my book and Dad. Actually, I don’t have to bring up Dad. I doubt anyone knows.

I ate a rather large lunch and now I feel like I could just drop into a food coma.

Entirely unproductive. A total waste of a day. I am just simply unable to concentrate or do anything. I feel jaded. I am disappointed in so many people… 3. It’s funny how even with the lowest expectations, some people still fail. I had the most frustrating and infuriating conversation today. My father once told me it’s a mistake to assume people are all the same. People are different from you, they have different experiences and different abilities. This is the reason why what is obvious to me, isn’t obvious to everyone. And why apologizing just doesn’t seem like a good idea to some people.

I am tired. I think my body is still recovering from the vast amounts of alcohol I poured into it yesterday. Yesterday was such an awesome day. I parked my car in the middle of a field and ran through a wooded area to get to the Amphitheater where the Rockabilly band played. I felt so free running amid the trees. I tried to cement the sounds and smells and sights of that moment in my memory. At the concert, I stood and danced while everyone else sat parked in lawn chairs. They played so many amazing songs, how people could stay seated is beyond me. There was a little venom. Some woman walked by me and sneered, “You keep rockin’, girlie.”

“Eat your heart out, mama” I replied.

After the concert, Laura drove me to the casino in her red BMW convertible. It was a beautiful night and I reached my arms up toward the stars and felt the air rush past me. It reminded me of those couple days I spent in Wisconsin back in 1998, driving around in an old convertible that kept stalling out. When we got to the casino, I was turned away because I didn’t have my ID. Yes, I was carded. Apparently I look young… which is pure silliness but I’ll take it as a compliment nonetheless. Honestly, I think the guard was just flexing his power.

Let’s hope tomorrow will be a good, productive day. It may be just as magical as yesterday… just minus the serenading, romantic, and unfortunately married, Buddy Holly impersonator.