Category Archives: Home

Donna Villa Sold

As of March 28, 2014, the Donna Villa is no longer mine. Sold it to a couple who plans on renting it for two years and then giving it to the man’s mother to live out her years.

It was almost exactly 10 years ago that I bought it. I was so proud. I did it totally on my own without anyone’s help. Except the hallway floor. My father thought the parquet floor was so atrocious he told me that he would buy me nice linoleum tile. And he did.

Walking through the house the last time, I remembered walking through it the first time. I loved it. Yes, it was garishly painted and filled with stacks of newspapers and crates of soda but I saw through it. I knew it was my house. I called my father to come and check it out. He looked it over and said it looked like a cottage. He liked it too.

At settlement, the seller told me it was a happy house. It was a happy house and a happy home. My initial plan was to live there for 5 years. I figured that by age 34, I’d have definitely met my husband and would be ready to move out to start a family. That didn’t happen. I was off by 5 years.

I look back and I have to admit, I don’t immediately remember the happy times. I remember turning off the ringer on the phone because of Rob’s insistence and missing all the phone calls through the night from my sister trying to get me to the house to deal with my dad who eventually died the next morning. I remember lying in the fetal position in the bathroom after another breakup, crying. I remember all the nights I watched La Femme Nikita, drinking Three Buck Chuck, feeling hopeless.

And in 1 year, my life changed. I met Eddie. I moved into Eddie’s place. We got married. We had Jimmy.

Then in January I decided to check the real estate listings to see if there was a better home for us. And I found it. We went to the Open House the next day and fell in love with it.

Oddly enough, it looks a lot like the Donna Villa. Just bigger.

The Donna Villa was still on the market after 6 months. We couldn’t put in an offer on the new house. I decided to fire my real estate agent and hire someone who could get it done. I called Lynne and before I could say, “You’re fired!” she said, “I have a cash buyer! You’ll have an offer in the morning!”

Talk about perfect timing.

Next Friday is settlement on the new house. I can’t wait. Can’t wait to make it our home. I look forward to giving Jimmy a good, happy place to live.

Even though I moved out of the Donna Villa months ago, signing the paperwork, finalizing the sale, felt like the end of a chapter in my life. I am happy.

The final reveal!

Ever wondered what the donnavilla looks like? Me neither. But here it is! Replete with the new laminate floors!!!

Donnavilla

Donnavilla

Yes, I own an organ. Yes, there are two Elvis busts on the organ. Yes, the Elvis busts are draped with leis and scarves that I received at Elvis Stylist concerts. No, I will not be sharing any photographs of my bedroom. I may share a photograph of my office if I get new carpeting.

New Floors!

While I was out on the ocean, fulfilling my dad’s final wishes, the contractor was at the Donnavilla, putting in the new floors. They aren’t quite finished yet… still need to add the molding. But here’s a sneak peak:
New Floors in the Donnavilla

To say I am thrilled would be a massive understatement. Why I didn’t do this before is beyond me! Wait, yeah, I remember. I thought my future was leading me down a different path… Oh well! Now I have nice floors!

Goodbye Ruby Tuesday

The carpeted floors are going bye bye on Tuesday not today. That actually works really well because I won’t be around. You see, tomorrow we are chartering a boat to release my father’s ashes. My dad’s friend, Johnny actually got us a boat and the four of us (five if you count the captain) are heading out to carry out my daddy’s final wishes. Of course, dad’s wishes weren’t that we do it from a boat. He wanted us to throw him off a Belmar rock jetty. For some reason, this didn’t seem quite do-able so we decided to do it from a boat.

I like the idea that the Atlantic Ocean is his resting place. Who wants to go to a cemetery? It’s so much nicer to sit and look out at the ocean and know he’s there.

My one client said to me, “But Donna, isn’t it illegal to sprinkle a person’s ashes into the ocean?”

I smiled and said, “They can come after me.”

This client of mine is a channel/psychic/healer. She told me that dad is very proud of us and happy. She also told me she was Mary, Queen of Scots in a past life. I believe her.

Chilly Willy

I turned off the heat. My last bill was 300.00 which was really abnormal. I am not sure if it’s because it’s been super cold and my heat has been cranking or if it’s this energy deregulation. I have had so many people tell me I should start selling energy. It’s supposedly easy and lucrative. I don’t care. The people selling it may be making money hand over fist but they come across as zombies to me. All network marketers do. Okay, almost all. I am sure there are some good network marketing opportunities out there… somewhere. It’s when people are more concerned with building a pyramid than selling a product that my bullshit alert goes off. Whatever.

My second proof came in on Friday. The inside is fine except I found a couple tiny typos. The cover also has an issue. It’s not centered correctly. I have a call in to the printer and I am waiting for their response. I have no intention of going through another proof round. I figure I will see what they have to say about the cover, hopefully it’s their fault. And then I’ll upload the new interior and rather than wait for the proof to arrive, I’ll just approve it early and go with it. That’s my plan and I am sticking to it.

Last night, Poopie and I watched an episode of Night Gallery on Hulu. It’s an episode that really freaked out my parents when it first aired. I remember them both individually telling me about the episode numerous times while growing up.

It stars Lawrence Harvey who sports the most lovely sideburns! They look quite a bit like Pookie’s burns. Let me tell you, the episode is awesome. And I wonder if it was actually a mistake or if it was done intentionally… by Tommy or maybe Rhona? This little tidbit shouldn’t ruin anything… in fact, I already new the outcome from the beginning… I wish I could have taken it in fresh though.

Why do you have to be so nice?

I spent three consecutive evenings organizing all my receipts from the last number of years so I could find all the invoices from Ray’s HVAC. And I found all of them. There weren’t that many. I put together a little graph showing the amount of money I’ve been spending on repairing the unit over the last 5 years and I waited for Ray to arrive. He came round a little after 12 as he had promised. He went out back to the unit, removed a panel, diagnosed the issue as a burnt out flux capacitor and replaced it. I stood there with my invoices and graph in my hand ready to pounce as soon as the issue was resolved. Ray then said, “Sorry about this Donna, it’s under warranty! See ya!” And he took off. I was dumbstruck. Maybe it was a good thing that I told him last time that I make my money by showing company’s how to get the word out on the top Social Media sites.

Here’s the thing, I like Ray. I’ve always liked Ray. I tend to get angry at Ray when he’s not around but as soon as he stops by, I see him and think, “I like him!” And he did the right thing this time. Watch how fast this changes when the heater stops working.

I am going to have to decide within the next few weeks what to do with the leak that has occurred twice now, each time happening the first day I turn on the air. My 5 year warranty is almost up and if there’s a reason for the leak, I would prefer to get it fixed now rather than later. Of course, why does it only leak the very first day and not again?

I dunno. The main issue of this hour is fixed. I’ll deal with the other issue later.

YOU SOLD ME A LEMON!

A Telephone Conversation
“Ray’s HVAC, can you hold?”HVAC Nightmares
“Yeah….”
“Ray’s HVAC, how can I help you?”
“Is this the answering service or the office?”
“It’s the answering service, how can I help you?”
“I need to talk to Ray.”
“Is this Donna X, 666 Brimstone and Hellfire?”
“How did you know that?”
“You must have called before because you are in our computer system.”
“Does your computer system also report that I’m the biatch that screams at Ray at least 3 times every year?”
“No, Ma’am, it doesn’t say that in our system.”
“Well let him know it’s that time again, my air conditioner has stopped working.”
“I’ll have him call you… Thank you so much! Buh Bye!”

Yes. It’s true. My air conditioner… less than 5 years old is on the fritz again. It happened on Friday. I turned it off. Changed the filter. Decided to give it some time off. Left it off for a couple days. Finally today, I decided it was time to check on it. Damn thing isn’t working. The inside fan turns on and blows non-refrigerated air. The outside fan doesn’t turn on at all. It is also emitting a sharp humming sound.

He’s been around twice this year so this next visit will be #3. The unit blew a fuse AND it leaked. Last year it leaked. I am trying to get together all my invoices that I’ve paid over the last 5 years. I can’t imagine that this is acceptable behavior. Like I said to him the last time he was out, “Ray, you’re a nice guy but I was really hoping to go at least 10 – 15 years before I had to see you again.”