Donna’s 2003 Resolutions
Once again we review the success and failure of last year’s resolutions.

1. Join LAFitness. Exercise, move and breath, meet people!
FAILED! I did not join LAFitness or any other health spa. I did try to take long walks but that doesn’t really go along with the true goal which was meeting people.

2. Keep room and office cleaned despite the fact there is no room for anything.
FAILED! This has always been an issue for me. My room continues to be a shamble. My biggest fear is that now Lisa and I are moving out and into a condo, we will become the female equivalent to the Collier Brothers. The only comfort I take is that I would most likely be Homer.

3. End the crazy cycle of Body Dismorphia.
FAILED! This ain’t ever gonna happen. No matter what I do, I still see myself in parts as opposed to a whole. When I look in the mirror I see thighs and hips. The other day I was looking through pictures I had just gotten developed and there was a picture of me from Halloween dressed in a cute mod minidress and I couldn’t get over how thin I looked. This can’t be me— this isn’t how I see myself in the mirror!

4. When I catch a man looking at me in a bar or somewhere, I will hold his stare and smile. I will not look away quickly and wonder if there is a piece of food stuck to the corner of my mouth.
PARTIAL SUCCESS! Although I am still lacking for a significant other or even an insignificant other, I have made an honest effort to smile and be friendlier.

5. If the stocks I own recover, buy a townhouse and become even more unabhaengig.
SUCCESS! Okay, my stocks did recover for the month of November and then they went back in the toilet. Regardless this was my most successful resolution because I did, in fact, go out and find a condo and am in the midst of purchasing it.

6. Stop buying stupid things just because they are cheap. Realize that 50.00 is not too expensive for a pair of nice pants.
SUCCESS! Yes, this was also a success. I have really tried to cut down on my impulse bargain purchases and I can proudly say I did not buy a single pair of corduroy pants in fluorescent colors as I have in years past. I have saved my money and spent it on more wise purchases that may have been more expensive but at least they look pretty hanging in my closet.

7. Stop watching so much TV, especially on Friday and Saturday nights. Get out more even if that means going out alone.
FAILED! I still don’t go out much, especially on weekends. I suppose my lack of boyfriends owes a lot to the fact that I rarely venture from my house. Heck, I never leave my computer! Perhaps once I am living on my own I will find it easier to go out. We shall see.

8. Sit up straight and don’t fold legs underneath or one on top of the other. Stop being a contortionist. I don’t want varicose veins.
FAILED! I continue to cross my legs and am completely uncomfortable if my legs aren’t contorted. Without a doubt I will have legs that look like the legs of my first grade teacher: fish belly white with a road map of green veins zig zagging past purple splotches and red and black dots. Attractive!

Meg’s MayFly Project
Summarize the last year of your life in 20 words or less.
Here is my entry:
Overworked.
Lonely. EHarmony fiasco.
Disillusioned. MUST MOVE OUT.
Searching, Searching. FOUND.
Bank account dwindles. At least I have equity…
FREEDOM!

Spent yesterday afternoon with my Aunt Helen and cousins. It is nice to be surrounded by family and see how well others with the same genes turned out. Makes me feel hopeful. Two of my little cousins are following in my footsteps and are learning to juggle. I worked with them a little and they are getting good. Very soon they will be passing the balls just like circus folk! Didn’t know I was a juggler, huh? It is true. Back when I was in high school I taught myself. The main reason behind learning was that I wanted to intimidate my Track & Field opponents by juggling shot puts. Sadly, I was never was able to attain that much strength. At any rate, I wanted to surprise everyone with the news that I was buying a condo. I walked in the door and everyone congratulated me on the purchase. Did Mom call ahead of me? No. They all read donnaville.

P.S. Note the countdown to settlement on the right column. I am not anxious. Not at all.

MERRY CHRISTMAS
I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas!

The loot: Heartland Valley Village Porcelain Lighted Church, Supergirl underwear, fleece pullover, exercise ball, knitting book, gold bracelet, Monkees Missing Links Vol 1 CD, Monkees 2nd Season DVD, stationary, and a Wonder Woman tin.

The plan: Lisa and I are off to see Washington cross the Delaware which has become our tradition. A group of guys, dressed in Revolutionary garb, reenact the crossing. The weather is so mild, I think they may make it across this year! Then we will have dinner. After dinner, Mom and Lisa will go see that Hobbit movie for which I just can’t feign enthusiasm. While they are watching the movie, I will clean my room. 🙂 Christmas miracles do occur!

Christmas Eve dinner consisted of mushroom soup, peirogis, aglio e olio, smelts, and poppy seed roll. Very yummy indeed. My mother gave Lisa and me 2 presents to unwrap. I now have a beautiful gold bracelet and THE MONKEES MISSING LINKS VOL 1 CD!!!!!!!!

Off I go to Mass. May you all have visions of sugar plums dancing in your heads as you wait for Santa’s visit!

It was 2 years ago today that I boarded a plane and left Germany and H. The trip was a sort of last hurrah. Considering my purpose, it was a lovely trip filled with Weihnachtsmarkts and mugs of Glühwein. It was so nice to hold H’s hand and be one of those elusive “couples.” I try not to reminisce since I now realize that it was only special to me and that H never had any intentions. Five years of my life spent waiting for someone who never planned on catching up. At least I cut my losses. Since then, I devoted myself to moving on. The last 2 years were spent trying to replace him with a slightly different model. One who wasn’t so frightened of commitment and Republicans. Only recently did I decide that instead of replacing him, I would take control of my life, make a home for myself and if a man happens to intersect with me, so be it. I am finished with waiting.

So far so good. Only real big ticket item is the windows. Hopefully we can negotiate something. I gave the Mortgage Broker the signed papers and the check. All seems to be going well. Other than the stress I put on myself, this has been rather painless. Of course there is still much left to do (and checks to sign).
I will continue to move forward with a steady resolution and persistence. I will achieve my goal!

Off I go to the home inspection. My realtor suggested I bring daddy along. This will be just the 2nd time I have seen the house. I hope I still like it! My fingers are crossed that there is nothing overly wrong with the place.

Called banks and brokers. Got rates. Compared rates and fees. Tried negotiating. Tried pleading. Widdled it down to 2. They were practically identical. How to decide? Well Corina wore a really nice striped shirt and a CAPE! She also drives a Monte Carlo which I think is a really nice looking car. She is also tall and has a firm handshake. Laurie has very small hands and when we shook, I felt disturbed, as if I was shaking a child’s hand. In my head, I heard Mike Myers say: “Carnies, small hands, smell like cabbage.” And so that is how I made the decision. Laurie dressed like me and had large hands.
I feel good.

Lisa and I drove by our (hopefully) future residence. After we passed, I realized Lisa could have taken a picture of it with her new cell phone that is equipped with a digital camera. Wouldn’t have done much good even had I remembered; she still hasn’t figured how to get the images from the camera to the computer.
I remembered my dream last night. I was having a mad love affair with Mo Rocca who seems to be on every countdown show that’s shown on cable. The mad love affair consisted of us sliding down a playground slide and playing tag– but I knew he loved me with all his heart and when I awoke I was slightly disappointed that I was no longer plural. Even more so, I was rather surprised that my unconsious mind chose Mo Rocca as the object of my affection. Mo Rocca!?!

She accepted my bid!!! If all goes well, I HAVE A HOUSE! (Or rather a condominium).

I remember, years and years ago when my grandmother was still alive, we were sitting around her kitchen table talking. My grandmother said, “I am thinking, maybe I should get one of those Florida condoms.”
“No Nanny, you mean CONDO– condom is something else.”
“Oh, dear. No wonder everyone looked at me strange when I was talking about it after church.”