One of my favorite characters in the Frankie Avalon/Annette Funnicello beach movies was the one portrayed by Jody McCrea. His character often changed names, he was alternately known as Bonehead, Deadhead or Big Lunk. One of his co-stars in these movies was John Ashley who later went on to do the “voice” in the A-Team theme song. So why and I bringing up Mr Jody McCrea? Last year, my accountant, Uncle Dick, (who is not my uncle) told me I should save my money and just use TurboTax to get my taxes done. I followed his recommendation and spent about 3 weeks crying over my keyboard. It wasn’t easy and I struggled. I finally submitted it, not quite certain I had even done it correctly. This feeling was compounded when my refund check NEVER arrived. Every few weeks I would complain to Rob or my parents or Lisa how I never got my refund and I was scared that the IRS was either dicking me over or going to arrest me for submitting an entirely messed up statement. This year I decided I didn’t care what Uncle Dick would charge me, I wasn’t going to go through TurboTax and no refund again. I even sent him my last years receipt so he could take a look and tell me what I did wrong. On Friday he called me and said, “Donna?”
“Yes, Uncle Dick?”
“Your refund was direct deposited into your bank account 3 weeks after you submitted.”
“What?”
“It was direct deposited, kid”
“Really?”
“Yep”
“Okay. Thanks!”
I FEEL LIKE a DEADHEAD, BONEHEAD, BIG LUNK! How I NEVER noticed such a large deposit is beyond me. I can’t believe this is something I worried about for a FULL YEAR. So stupid.

A few weeks ago I was listening to XM and a song came on the 60’s station that I HAD NEVER HEARD BEFORE! This is quite unusual for me. I’ve been listening to 60’s music ever since Oldies 98.1 WOGL appeared on Philadelphia airwaves back in the mid-eighties. This song was Ma Belle Amie by The Tee Set. It’s a great song, at least in my book. I made a mental note to look the group up and find out more. Of course I plum forgot until just yesterday when the same song came on XM again! This morning I finally checked them out and learned they were from Holland and they are pretty much a one hit wonder. Here’s the video from Youtube. I am sure I don’t have to tell you that my heart fell into my left leg upon seeing Mr Peter Tetteroo. So pretty!

I finally gave everyone a big hug and kiss and walked out of my parents’ house leaving Audra and Lisa behind as they tapped their stylists against their dyed eggs. Once inside the donnavilla, I looked in the mirror and found I had a huge glob of Midori icing on my nose. Thanks for not telling me, guys!

I spent the afternoon and evening watching Lisa and Audra do pysanky. I chose to putz around instead. Lisa needed a dessert for a St Patrick’s party at her school for tomorrow so I made Midori cupcakes for her in addition to reading the Sunday paper and asking Audra silly questions like, “I hope you intend to breastfeed the baby.” Wait, that wasn’t a question. I suppose I spent the afternoon making demands. Typical.

Robert spent the day at a trade show. The night before, (Saturday night) we spent the evening ruining ourselves at Minado’s. Those of you who live near Little Ferry, NJ, Carle Place, NY, East Norriton, PA, Natick, MA, or Morris Plains, NJ and love sushi must go to Minado’s. Just as their Web site states, it’s the ultimate sushi buffet. Rob’s friend Steve counted all the sushi he consumed, he said it was 28 pieces. I didn’t count but I have a feeling I ate around the same amount. After Minado’s, Rob put V is for Vendetta in the DVD player. Suddenly I understood the significance of having Ron Paul’s money bomb on the 5th of November. I really wanted to watch the movie but I had a hard time taking it seriously– the man in a mask orating in such flowery speech, it just seemed really silly to me. Then the usual happened, I fell asleep. It happened the night before as well. Rob brought over No Country for Old Men. Within 5 minutes of the movie starting, I screamed, covered my eyes and then I fell asleep. Rob said the movie sucked and I missed nothing. I think the reason it garnered so many awards and accolades is that it kept its audience in a constant state of panic, anxiety and fear. It’s the exact same agenda as the media.

Tomorrow I go back to the office. I haven’t been there in a week. The mere thought of the huge backlog that awaits me is frightening.

The weekend was relaxing yet full of activity. It feels like the weekend started on Thursday because Rob and his friend’s played the Open Mike that evening at the Whitpain Tavern. Their set list was another one in which I was clueless to almost all the songs they performed: The Boys Are Back in Town, 5:15, Thunder Road, War Dogs or Pigs, I can’t remember, and Blue Morning. One day Robert is going to read this blog and realize that each time I write, “I really wish Rob and his band would play a song I know like something from the Monkees or Elvis, it’s really a very very very subtle hint that I would like him to play a song that I know, like something from the Monkees or Elvis.

On Saturday, Audra and Steve visited. I said I would serve dinner. They got to the house, we talked for a little while and THEN I ORDERED PIZZA! I tell you– dinner parties are silly and the time spent cooking is ridiculous– I say, forget dinner parties– instead– PIZZA PARTY! It’s much easier and quite frankly, comparing it to the food I serve, it tastes better.

Sunday afternoon, Rob and I went to the grocery store. As we exited, we used the RedBox dvd kiosk to rent 3:10 to Yuma. I was not happy with this rental but there was absolutely nothing else in there that I wanted to see (actually, wouldn’t have minded seeing Failure to Launch). Oddly enough, I ended up really liking it. The movie reminds me of a cross between the movie, High Noon with Gary Cooper and the Albert Camus short story, The Guest. I’ll just leave it at that and recommend everyone watch it. I am going to see if I can rent the original version with Van Heflin and Glen Ford as well as Rio Bravo with Mr. John Wayne.

Now I must finish getting ready for work. It’s gonna be one heck of a week. I am sponsoring an event on Wednesday that has proven to be more popular than I ever imagined. I gotta get ready.

I turned on the Oscars. Watched maybe 15 minutes of it. Turned it off because I was sickened by all the smug faces.

Last night I finally watched La Vie En Rose. It was good– not my favorite movie ever, but not bad. Robert and I talked about it afterward and agreed that the nonlinear storyline was more distracting than artistic. It was odd how WWII was completely skipped over. I was surprised at how it wasn’t until the end that it was quickly mentioned that she had a daughter that she pretty much abandoned. Looking back, there didn’t seem to be a single scene in which she wasn’t drunk, doped up, or throwing a tantrum. My favorite scene was when she discovers her married lover has been killed in a plane crash and she runs toward the camera with her arms outstretched and her fingers wiggling, crying and calling out, “MARCEL! MARCEL!” Reminded me of Faye Dunaway in Mommy Dearest, “Tina, GET ME THE AXE!” Regardless, it was an interesting movie and I did enjoy it.

Tomorrow I need to awaken early and get myself over to the New York office. Not looking forward to it. I just want to close my eyes and think about Longwood Gardens. Rob and I visited it yesterday. It’s one of the estates of the du Pont family. Apparently Pierre du Pont loved gardening and so he built this huge sprawling greenhouse where he grew tons of gorgeous plants. I’ve never seen so many orchids in one place. After touring the conservatory, we caught a reenactment of a Japanese Tea Ceremony. A man and his son performed the ceremony. I think it was a father and son. Rob said they weren’t father and son but rather “life partners.” The age difference between them makes me think otherwise. Regardless, I had a strong suspicion that in addition to reenacting the Japanese Tea Ceremony, they might also reenact episodes of Star Trek in their basement. I just got that vibe. The whole ceremony seemed so overblown and insane to me. Bowing and inspecting utensils and slurping down the tea and placing the ladle so very carefully, turning the bowl 2 quarter turns so as not to drink from the front of the bowl since “we offer respect even to inanimate objects.” To each their own. Rob looked glassy-eyed and read to commit harakiri so we left before the ceremony officially ended. On our way out the door, he said he’s like to partake in an American Beer drinking ceremony. I agreed.

I went to my parents’ house after work to be with Bo. With my parents gone, Bo is by himself and he doesn’t like to be alone. Little Bo loves people and loves to love people and he also loves to spin in circles. So I go home and we spin in circles together. My parents will be back from Mexico on Friday. Back to sloppy Philadelphia in all its snowy, rainy splendor.

Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day. A day I used to dread. It always seemed like everyone was getting chocolates and flowers except me. I’d sit at home and watch romantic movies like Death in Venice and The Night Porter. I am glad I am not alone this year. I am glad I have someone.

I am suffering withdrawal! I keep thinking, “I must call Daddy… wait Daddy’s not here, I’ll call Mommy… wait Mommy’s not here either! AHahahaaiaiaiaiaiai!!” Yes, I am 33 years old. I call my parents every day. Numerous times throughout the day. Yes, I know. It’s all becoming clear. This explains my spinsterhood.

I had the oddest dream last night. I keep thinking about it, trying to make sense out of it. The dream felt like a movie. I was watching this large group of people wade out into the ocean. I was aware that there was an alien entity submerged in the water and the people were being compelled by this creature to enter the water. Everyone was anxious for the creature to reveal itself. In an instant, out from the water sprung two very, very tall naked women. Right after emerged two very, very morbidly obese, naked men. More weird, almost freakish creatures, unnaturally larger than normal humans, arose from out of the water. The people embraced them and I had a feeling these strange water nymphs were actually the collective dreams and desires of the group. Suddenly I too was submerged but I realized that the creature orchestrating this was evil and I started to swim away. As I tried to doggie paddle, I was transported to a different situation. The ocean bit was now over and one of the men went home to his wife. Once in his presence, his wife went mad and attacked him. I watched her viciously beat him. She used a walnut cracker to break his fingers. I could feel his pain as his fingers twisted and cracked. This was clearly brought on by the ocean creature and I wondered if all the people faced the same end.

My parents are in Mexico. They left early this morning. I am hoping and praying everything went smoothly and continues to go smoothly for them.

I am quite a bit jealous. It would be wonderful to feel the sun on my face and the warm sand between my toes. I think back to when I was laid off from my old job. Someone had said to me, “Donna, take a vacation- go somewhere warm and just veg for a week.” I laughed. How could I go on vacation when my whole world was upside down? And now I look back and wish I had taken a trip. Maybe it’s time for me to go somewhere? It feels like ages since I went on a trip to a place not within a 100 mile radius of where I live.

All and all, it was a good weekend. I got a lot of stuff accomplished. I had a period-induced mini-freak out this afternoon but I am feeling better and quite a bit foolish. Things happen when you got ovaries. Otherwise, everything else was good. Got to see the movie Reno 911 which I guiltily enjoyed. I audited my November commissions. I had a lovely dinner with Robert at an Italian restaurant. The food was crappy but the ambiance and company was wonderful. I spent time with Li Li and Bo. I talked on the phone with Audgie. Yeah, it was a good weekend. Except for the freak out.

I ‘d like to dedicate this, the greatest video of all time, to my parents. You see, tomorrow, my parents are breaking free. No, they are not breaking free to an orgiastic Prélude à l’après-midi d’un faune fantasy-world like Freddie Mercury. They are on their way to Mexico for 5 days to temporarily escape the seemingly interminable Philadelphia winter. I hope they have a wonderful time!

One of my very favorite movies growing up was The Pirate Movie. I loved it! What was it about Kristy MacNichol and that mullet? Perhaps it had little to do with Kristy and more to do with Christopher Atkins. HECK! What am I talking about? We all know it was Ted Hamilton and that bejeweled codpiece! Slumming around youtube, I found my favorite song:

If you don’t think this is the coolest song and video– I’ll cut you!