I forgot to mention that I saw Sex and the City last weekend. As I’ve always maintained, I watched Sex and the City mainly because I enjoyed the confusion, disgust, and shock it produced within me. The movie did not disappoint. Charlotte shat her pants. Really. Miranda displayed tufts of her private part fuzz poking out the edges of her bathing suit. Samantha got fat and let her gut bulge out from her white jeans. WHITE JEANS!?! And Carrie got stood up at the altar. Miranda also had two VERY GRAPHIC making love scenes which I thought would be right at home in a porno movie. I can’t help but wonder about the woman who portrays this character. I understand she has children and since she is here on this earth, she must have parents too. Has she no shame? How could she do that knowing there is a very good chance her children or parents may see it or hear about it? I dunno. Maybe it’s just me. Getting back to the movie, Carrie was about to get married to her boyfriend “BIG” but he gets cold feet and doesn’t show up at the ceremony. They do run into each other as she leaves the church. She hits him with her bouquet, over and over again and screams, “I knew it! You humiliated me!” The rest of the movie shows her in mourning over the situation. Then at the very end she discovers that BIG has been writing her emails — transcribing love letters from a book and somehow this makes it all okay. They reunite and get married in court and Carrie wears a frumpy dress. I can’t figure out how this can be a happy ending. I guess it’s a happy ending because although BIG is the biggest jerk of all time, he’s also very handsome and rich and those things negate the jerkiness AND his money allows Carrie the ability to buy expensive, non-orthopedic shoes and silly dresses. The other clincher is that Samantha breaks up with a very handsome, successful man because she doesn’t like being in a monogamous relationship. She then celebrates her 50th birthday!?! As the credits rolled I couldn’t help but imagine how Carrie will continue to be humiliated by BIG and how Samantha will prowl around, looking for empty sex from the likes of disgusting men who would be interested in that sort of thing. It’s a tragedy in the form of a romantic comedy.

So yeah, I enjoyed it. God didn’t.

John Phillip Law – Perhaps best known as playing the nearly naked angel in Barbarella.
Dick Martin – Half of Rowen and Martin’s Laugh In, say good night, Dick
Harvey Korman – Loved on The Carol Burnett Show but I loved him as the principal in the movie Lord Love a Duck.

So sad!

My feet hurt. I really don’t know how those ladies on Sex and the City do it! Yeah, I know it’s just a TV show/movie but they make wearing high heels seem like a breeze. If only it were so easy. Maybe it helps when you don’t have feet the size of Cleveland. I would probably be better off wearing the boxes the shoes came in. It’s a shame I picked Donnaville as my domain name and not SasquatchGirl.

Speaking of feet, my plan is to see The Sex and the City movie this weekend. I realize I will have to go alone since no one I know seems to approve of the show. And I don’t approve of it either– the characters are such sluts and they speak so coarsely yet I can’t seem to turn away. I MUST SEE IT! I’ve watched my fair share of SATC episodes. Every single episode I have ever watched, I have had the same thought, “I think Samantha was sexually molested as a child.” And then I realize that she’s not a real person and there is no history behind her character and I am just silly for over analyzing it.

I bet you can’t guess the most popular entry on Donnaville? It may not be the most popular ever but it’s the most popular since March when I first installed the WordPress plugin, BlogStats. It’s the post entitled, Cute Marie, Real Cute. How humbling is that? It’s just a YouTube clip and that’s about it! I honestly can’t figure out why so many people search for Cute Marie, Real Cute. Are there more Osmond fans out there than I ever imagined? Is there another reference that I am just not catching? I don’t know. It just puzzles me every time I look at my stats.

Last night I remembered I had bought a couple boxes of instant Indian food entrees. They come in a sealed bag and you can either boil the bag or microwave the contents. It’s so easy. Lisa and I were addicted to them a couple years ago. I pulled out one of the boxes and was about to open it up when I noticed the expiration date was January 2006! But I bought this not more than a couple months ago! I checked the other boxes and the expiration dates were 2006 OR OLDER! Instead of Instant Indian, I made chicken, rice and beans. It doesn’t surprise me that they were past their expiration dates– the Indian Market where I got them was disgusting. It was really filthy and I almost left without buying anything but I felt weird leaving empty-handed and these were the only things that looked okay. HA! 2 years past expiration okay.

Last night I watched the movie Failure to Launch. I bought it Monday at Acme, it was on clearance for $1! It was a cute movie– stupid but cute. I couldn’t get over how haggard Sarah Jessica Louise Parker looked in it. She should have taken two tips from Doris Day– always be photographed through a vaseline-drenched and gauze-draped camera lens AND make sure the silly roommate character is old and cranky (Not Zooey Deschanell!).

Last night I watched the movie, The Notorious Betty Page. I’ve been wanting to see it for ages. I’ve always gotten a kick out of the pictures of Betty Page that would cross my path. Unfortunately, her life didn’t exactly lend itself to a very exciting movie. She took great pictures, that’s about it. She had a few very tragic events occur but other than occuring, the movie doesn’t really depict them as having any more effect on her. The one event was a gang rape that I found absolutely frightening. Nothing was really shown– and perhaps that’s why it is haunting me so… my imagination is making it much worse. Betty is lured into a car by a seemingly nice guy, promising to take her out dancing. Instead, he takes her to an abandoned warehouse where a bunch of guys appear. The scene quickly ends but you know what is going to happen. It was frightening to me and I can’t seem to release it from my consciousness. Who would have thought a movie about a pinup queen would have such a scene? I wish I hadn’t watched it. I really don’t need trauma like that in my life.

When certain things occur in my life and I need guidance or soothing, I get in my car and I turn on the radio and I wait. This may seem odd but I have always felt that the next couple songs that play are sent by the universe to help me. Perhaps I have watched Jean Cocteau’s film Orphee too many times but I find that on a whole, whatever song comes on, I can usually find a connection, an interpretation, and advice within it. I still remember the song that came on the radio as I drove to meet Rob for the first time. It was Natalie Cole’s Everlasting Love and when I drove home, Partridge Family’s I Think I Love You played. At that moment, I was pretty certain that something good was in store for me.

Last night I watched my second NetFlix movie, John and Mary. Never heard of it? Don’t fret. It’s an old movie from 1969 starring Mia Farrow and Dustin Hoffman. The trailer and posters boast, “This isn’t your mother’s love story!” The funny thing is, for people of my generation, it very well could be. Mia and Dustin meet at a bar, take a liking to each other, go back to his very chic studio apartment, have sex, wake up the next morning and spend the rest of the day getting to know each other. The very last scene has them deciding to live together. They jump into bed and Dustin says, “I don’t know your name!” Mia says, “I’m Mary, what’s your name?” Dustin says, “John.” They then giggle and …FADE OUT! Why in the world with all the movies out there, would I pick this one to queue up? Years and years ago I watched John and Mary on A&E- back when A&E showed quality entertainment. Believe it or not, A&E stood for Arts and Entertainment. At any rate, I watched a good portion of the movie and I remember loving it. There was something so very haunting about Mia’s face and I loved the quiet of the movie. I loved how it felt so real. There was an uncomfortability to certain scenes and a tentativeness. It was a movie I never could forget but oddly enough, I couldn’t quite remember it either. Watching it last night, I loved it but it was odd how much of it I had forgotten.

After John & Mary, The Stepford Wives came on TCM. I forgot how much I loved that movie! I know you know that right now I am going to gush about Paula Prentiss… so I won’t disappoint you. I LOVE PAULA PRENTISS! Of all the actresses through history, I wish Paula Prentiss never had to age and retire… I wish she could stay young and continue to star in movies forever! Okay, the gushing has now ended. (Stop rolling your eyes! You guys know I have a heroine addiction) Watching the Stepford Wives, I couldn’t help but wonder why it was remade a few years ago with Nicole Kidman. Especially because the remake was so mucked up. The original is just perfect.

Here’s a question for the ages… Why can’t life be more like the opening credits of He & She?

I started up my Netflix subscription again. Rob and I got a bunch of DVDs just the other day and it dawned on me that I will only watch the DVDs one time and that’s it. What a waste! Besides, the last few weeks have seen me in a real movie mood. The first movie in my queue was Where’s Poppa. I saw it years ago and I remember it being so very politically incorrect and wrong in many ways. I also remember laughing very hard. Rob and I watched it last night. At least we attempted to watch it. Rob had me turn it off because it was so slow and boring. Maybe we just weren’t patient enough to wait for the movie to pick up? I don’t know. It could have been that I originally watched it on late night television and all the extraneous bits were cut out to make it fit the time slot. Once Where’s Poppa’s was out, Anthony Bourdain’s No Reservations went in. The second episode was insane. Anthony went to Quebec and hunted with an Inuit family. They shot a seal, brought it home and butchered it on the kitchen floor. The entire family then descended on the bloody carcass and consumed it raw…right there on the kitchen floor. I have never seen anything like that in my entire life. They offered Anthony one of the seal’s eyes which he slit open and sucked dry. I admire him. I really honestly do. Here, you can watch it on Youtube. If you dare!

TCM is changing their programming line up to honor Charlton Heston. How do I know this? They sent me an email. They’re nice that way. The problem is– I much prefer the movies they are deleting!

Add: (All times ET)
2:30 PM Private Screenings: Charlton Heston
3:30 PM The Buccaneer (1958)
5:30 PM The Hawaiians
8:00 PM Private Screenings: Charlton Heston
9:00 PM Ben-Hur
1:00 AM Khartoum
3:30 AM Major Dundee

Delete:
2:30 PM When the Boys Meet the Girls
4:15 PM Where the Boys Are
6:00 PM Follow the Boys
8:00 PM Cyrano de Bergerac
10:00 PM Moulin Rouge
12:15 AM Enter Laughing
2:15 AM Attack of the Crab Monsters
3:30 AM The Thing from Another World
5:00 AM Watch the Skies

It’s not my favorite sampling of Heston. Had they consulted me, I would have chosen:

The Greatest Show on Earth (1952) The dramatic lives of trapeze artists, a clown, and an elephant trainer against a background of a circus spectacle. Charlie portrays the circus manager.
Diamond Head (1963) Charlie portrays a Rich Hawaiian pineapple grower who also happens to be quite a bigot. How dare his sister Yvette Mimieux hook up with “Hawaiian” James Darren!
Planet of the Apes (1968) You know the saying, “Human see, human do.”
Soylent Green (1973) It’s people!

I really think TCM should hire me.

Quaker Oats sent me a coupon for $4.50! That really knocked my socks off!

Over the weekend, Rob and I got some DVDs at Best Buy. Eagle Vs Shark and Johnny Suede. Eagle Vs Shark was really cute and quirky and starred the one guy from Flight of the Conchords. Johnny Suede is a movie I have been wanting to see ever since I was in High School. I just never got around to it. Rob brought it over to me in Best Buy, “Check out who’s in this movie!”
“Oh Rob! You know I am not a Brad Pitt fan.”
“Just look!”
“Oh!!!!!! It’s Nick Cave!”
Rob didn’t even ask if we should get it, he just immediately put it in the buy stack. We watched it last night and it was just plain weird. When it ended, we both said in unison, “I don’t get it.” The one thing I am sure of is Catherine Keener later got a nose job because she had a “hook” in Johnny Suede.

The other day I was grumbling about my bank Wachovia (aka Wa-Caca). Over the last few days, I have been making mucho phone calls to CSchwab and I gotta tell you, so far, I am really impressed. They even have nice, helpful people working late Sunday night! Hats off to CSchwab!

My mind has really been overwhelmed with getting my finances together. So much so that I have noticed my focus on keeping my clothes hanging up and folded has lapsed a bit. That seems rather typical. The good news is that my finances should be totally together by the end of this week. Okay, maybe not totally together but in a better state than they were. I already feel a sense of accomplishment. I just wish it could come together faster. I hate that there are so many forms that need signing and stuff that needs activating. Very soon it will all be over. Very soon I will finally be in a state where I can breath easier. It’s funny how long I have allowed myself to cringe over something that has been very simple to fix. I am close– I am almost there!

Yesterday I searched IMDB to find the correct spelling of Jill Clayburgh’s name. Okay, not just the spelling; I needed to refresh my memory of her complete name. I went about it in such a backward manner. I typed Charles Bronson, found his wife Jill Ireland, clicked on her and found the name of her bio-flick, The Jill Ireland Story in which, guess who portrayed her? Clayburgh! I don’t know why I had such a block on her name since she occupies a very special place in my heart. A few years ago I watched her movie, An Unmarried Woman. I LOVED IT! Somehow I related– I don’t know why. It’s not like I’m married, with a child, facing a divorce and learning how to live without being defined by a man. Whatever. The thing is, watching it, Jill appeared to be a mature, older woman to me. Reading her bio on IMDB, I found out that Jill was MY AGE when she shot that movie! MY AGE! Why am I so surprised by this?

Youtube has a clip from this movie. Watching it now, Jill doesn’t seem so old anymore.