My neighbor Peter told me today that I will go to hell because I keep saying bad things about the guy who lives across the street from him. This is all BEHIND HIS BACK, mind you.
“I didn’t realize Thou shalt not call thy neighbor a retard was included in the 10 Commandments.”
Eleventh Commandment: Don’t let anyone named
“Peter” do anything behind your back.
Maybe Peter is referring to “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” or Psalm 101:5 Whoever secretly slanders his neighbor, Him I will destroy; The one who has a haughty look and a proud heart, Him I will not endure.
I swear, I really did think this guy was mentally challenged! I wasn’t trying to be cruel!
Many conservative Protestant churches (especially in the South) consider “backbiting” a serious character deficiency. In the hierarchy of sins, it’s not as egregious (or as fun) as coveting your neighbor’s property or lying or stealing. However…everyone named Vern or Bubba or Billy Bob knows that backbitin’ ain’t no thang for a Christian to be a-doin’:
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/backbiting
Gosh I feel horrible! I made an honest mistake about a person’s intellect (he really seemed mentally retarded) and to lighten my embarrassment, I cracked a couple silly jokes about it… AND NOW I AM GOING TO HECK!!!!!!
You’re Gosh Darn Right You Are, you backbiting heathen! (Backbiting sounds like some service a masseuse, or one of Tiger Woods’ mistresses, would provide for an extra fee).
How can you make an “honest mistake” about someone’s intellect unless you personally administer an IQ test…oh, wait a minute….”stupid is as stupid does”… so if your neighbor acts like a retard, maybe he is one, and then you haven’t broken any commandments because you’ve told the truth. Rest easy, backbiter.