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Donnerstag, Januar 30, 2003

The Smoking Gun: Joe Millionaire" finalist starred in bondage and fetish flicks Since I have expressed my dismay with Joe Bachelor, I thought I would confess a twisted wish. I want him to choose Sarah. This way, when he takes her aside and he confesses that he is not a milliionaire but a blue collar worker, she can say, "That is okay honey. I too have a confession, I star in kinky bondage and fetish films.... do you still love me?"
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Mittwoch, Januar 29, 2003

Recalling John Garfield, Rugged Star KO'd by Fate I loved John Garfield when I was a teenager, heck, I still do! Back then, my counterparts were pining for Kirk Cameron while I yearned for a man who died in 1952. Typical. Few of my favorite John Garfield movies: Humoresque with Joan Crawford and Oscar Levant(!!!) , Four Daughters and the sequel Four Wives, They Made me a Criminal with the Dead End Kids, Dust be my Destiny (also with Priscilla Lane who played opposite him in the Four Daughters and Four Wives), and last but not least (and I have forgotten a few) THE POSTMAN ALWAYS RINGS TWICE!!!!! What an absolutely terrific movie! I still remember how it blew me away. The next day I fell in love with Hank, a boy in school who just happened to resemble John Garfield. I was wandering the halls when I first spied him... and suddenly the room swirled and I heard music playing! A few weeks later, I anonymously put a note in Hank's locker declaring my love. I waited for his reaction, hoping he would be pleased. Instead, after reading the note, he crumpled it up and threw it away! Following behind him, I retrieved the note from the trash and in red ink scrawled.... something. And then I pried open his locker and taped the note to the inside door. I didn't wait for his reaction.
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Montag, Januar 27, 2003

Watched Bridezilla. Unreal. Words can't describe my reaction. Then I watched maybe 5 minutes of Joe Millionaire until I couldn't take anymore and I ran out of the room. I wound up in my bed (fetal position), repeating to myself: I am not like those women... they do not speak for me!
I am disturbed by the thought that there are men in the world who watch these shows and honestly believe that this is a true and honest depiction of woman. At least in movies or sitcoms, there is the element of fiction.... but these are 'reality' shows. What reality do they represent?!? Where do they find these people?!?!
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Sonntag, Januar 26, 2003

It is Sunday night and I am bored. That explains why I went on and looked up the losers who corresponded with me last Summer and then dropped me faster than a hot potato after one measly date. Can you believe most of them are still there!?! Certainly makes me feel better.... as if the onus is not on me. Online dating was a pulverizing experience and I am glad I threw in the towel-- Never Again! Although, I do get a sick thrill out of perusing just to see how many desperate, single men are out there. Makes me feel a little bit better...
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Audra's The Surreal Life Page 100% Audgie!!!
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Samstag, Januar 25, 2003

Cuss Control so true... and i am soooooo guilty
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Bundesdance New and Improved!
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Lisa, Audra, and I went to see Confessions of a Dangerous Mind last night. It should have been called the Chuck Bare-ass Show. There was so much naked male butt, I couldn't believe it. We were going to see The Hours but I thought it might be a little too depressing but as it turns out the Bare-ass show wasn't any better. I figured Confessions would be silly and light and present the hitman thing as nothing more than a delusion; I was wrong. Where is a Doris Day Rock/Hudson movie when you need one?
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Donnerstag, Januar 23, 2003

I should have written this sooner but I have been rather egocentric the past few days. Thank you to everyone who sent me an email or wrote me a comment. It really was comforting and I appreciate it.
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Sunday morning my father and I buried Lily. The ground was frozen and it was quite a challenge to dig the hole. We used a pick to break into the soil, over and over, an inch at a time. Finally after two hours a hole appeared. My mom and sister came out and all together we put Lily in her grave. It was so sad. I keep thinking of her, wearing her red sweater and covered in her favorite blanket, sleeping forever in that cardboard box, buried deep in the backyard.
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Sonntag, Januar 19, 2003

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God took the decision away from us. Lily died this morning at 3:25. She died peacefully. My Mom and I were with her. Mom woke me up at around 1:00 and said that Lily was close. We sat with her until the end. She was the sweetest, nicest little puppy and I already miss her so very very much.
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Samstag, Januar 18, 2003

When is the right time to put a pet to sleep? Little Lily is not doing good. She is weak and can hardly stand. She gets lost in the house. She can't see. She vomits, a lot. She doesn't go for walks nor does she beg for cookies. She is ravaged by age. Yet her heart continues to tick. She is worse at night. We say we will take her to the vet in the morning but by then she is almost okay. Except she has no life or spirit. She sleeps all day. She eats a little. The evening comes and she gets bad again. I know she isn't going to get any better. She doesn't seem to be in pain, exactly. With Kiwi, it was so clearly time. Kiwi had congestive heart failure and she couldn't lay down and she couldn't breathe. We had no choice but to take her to the vet and have him administer the shot. Lily is just old. Really, really old. I feel so helpless and I don't know what to do. Poor little Lily.
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Mittwoch, Januar 15, 2003

Beautycheck - virtual attractiveness Very Interesting.
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Dienstag, Januar 14, 2003

Wow! This is just about the nicest compliment I have ever received:Jewdez Bloggin' Lovefest. I had absolutely no idea-- I mean, I knew people read this blog but it always seemed to me that I was blogging in a void of sorts. At any rate, thanks Jewdez! I really appreciate it!
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Montag, Januar 13, 2003

retroCRUSH:Who was the hottest costumed TV Retrobabe? I voted for Julie.
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I AM BACK FROM NASHVILLE!!!!! What a weekend! I stayed at the Gaylord Opryland Hotel. Let me tell you it was huge. It took me 20 minutes to walk from my room to the meeting rooms. The hotel itself is the largest non-gambling hotel in America. It may even be larger than the state of Rhode Island. The inside of the hotel was designed to look like a city within a rainforest. (Does that make sense?) There was even a river going through the hotel! Reminded me of a cross between Disney World, Las Vegas, and the sealed city in Logan's Run. On Friday night we went to the Grand Ole Opry!!!! Charlie Pride performed!! Actually, I didn't know Charlie Pride until he started singing: "Kiss an Angel good morning, love her like a devil when you get back home" I almost jumped out of my seat and bellowed: "I love that song!" Somehow I never knew a black man sang it, for some reason I thought it was Kenny Rodgers. Here was the lineup: January 10 6:30-7:00 Jimmy Dickens, Jimmy C. Newman, Steve Azar, 7:00-7:30: Jeannie Seely, Charlie Louvin, Osborne Brothers, Joe Nichols, 7:30-8:00: John Conlee, T. Bubba Bechtol, Connie Smith, Jerry Douglas, 8:00-8:30: Jean Shepard, Jesse McReynolds and The Virginia Boys (who sang John Prine's Muhlenberg County!), Holly Dunn, Darryl Worley, 8:30-9:00: Bill Anderson, Jan Howard, and Charley Pride. At any rate, it was just great. A fabulous slice of Americana and I LOVED it! The next day I had my presentation and it went very, very well. Afterward a number of people came over and complimented me on my presentation skills. They also liked the application. Hopefully when we renegotiate my salary this quarter, they will remember this meeting and realize that I am drastically underpaid. Saturday we went to the Wildhorse Saloon and watched the Titans vs. the Steelers. Thankfully the Titans won and all the locals were in a good mood. Once the game was finished they cleared off the dance floor and held Line Dance Lessons. Guillermo asked me to dance and I took him up on his offer. For a Yankee and a Cuban, we line danced our hearts out! At 10:00 the bus came to pick us up but I said that I was having a good time and didn't want to go back to the hotel. A few others agreed and we went to a club right next door that had 4 tiers of dance floors. We initally stayed on the first floor and I actually found myself dancing to an Eminem song ,"I'm Slim Shady yes I'm Slim Shady." Personally, I find him repugnant but the song had a good beat and I could dance to it. I eventually convinced everyone to go down to the 80's dance floor. There were 2 big cages on either side of the dance floor and.... yes, I got into the one cage and danced!!! I felt like a 1960's go go girl... kinda like in the movie, It's a Bikini World... anyone ever see it? At any rate, the evening ended rather dramatically when I had to convince a Security Guard not to arrest one of my colleagues who had drank too much and apparently became violent before passing out. Talk about negotiation skills, once the police came I was able to get the charge changed from assault to a misdemeanor and he avoided a night in jail and walked (or rather carried) away with only an incident report. I eventually got to bed at around 3:30. The meetings on Sunday started at 7:30 and somehow I was able to wake up looking refreshed and rested. The flight home was uneventful. Today I worked a full day despite the weekend full of meetings. Regardless, I had a great time and I can't wait to go back to Nashville again!
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Mittwoch, Januar 08, 2003

German Prostitute, 77, Mugged After Night Shift
Jan 8, 2003 B E R L I N (Reuters) - A 77-year-old German prostitute was mugged after leaving a brothel at the end of her night shift and slightly injured, a police spokesman said Wednesday
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I'm going to Nashville. It's a business trip. I will demonstrate the application I designed and developed to a group of 100. Crazy how at one time being in front of a small group of 10 struck fear in my soul and now I yawn at a group of 100. I just hope my throat feels better by the time of my presentation.

1. Must stop eating peppermint nougat candy
2. Must wash dark clothes
3. Must pack
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Dienstag, Januar 07, 2003

To all the Byzantine Catholics on the old calendar out there:
Merry Hunky*Christmas!!!!
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Montag, Januar 06, 2003

Welcome to Slim Goodbody! I remember Slim Goodbody! I saw him live in Trenton years and years ago. Of course, back then, Slim had a huge brown afro. He looked a lot like Richard Simmons, I remember. Slim is the reason why I eat healthy and never, ever overindulge in sweets.
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No, I don't think I am going to watch Joe Millionaire tonight. There is something rotten about it. Each time I see the preview, I find myself distressed. That is even more distressed than I was after watching an episode of the Bachelor. (I remember screaming at the TV, "I accept your long as I can shove it up your a**!!!!!") I admit yesterday I watched the High School Reunion Reality Show. It came on right after Charmed and I was too lazy to turn the channel. Besides, I thought I might relate.... same year, same age. I didn't. I ended up just wanting to slap all of them. At any rate, Joe Millionaire disturbs me. The women are depicted as vain, money-grubbing, bitches. But at least they are honest in what they want. Old Joe Millionaire isn't being honest at all. It is cruel to purposely mislead people and then broadcast it for all to see. I wonder if the producers unsuccessfully dated the women involved and this is their way of exacting revenge? What will FOX come up with next?
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Sonntag, Januar 05, 2003

MonkeeMania 2002 Forum - micky and donna When did I marry Micky! My dream came true and I was completely unaware of it!
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Lisa and I saw Two Weeks Notice this afternoon. 13.00 for matinee!! Ridiculous! At any rate, we try to see Romantic Comedies-- it's the cause I support. I walk the street with my placard reading: "MORE HOLLYWOOD ROMANTIC FLUFF!" and "BRING BACK DORIS DAY AND ROCK HUDSON!" Two Weeks Notice was well meaning but it missed by a mile. This was the first time I could tell a character was cut from a movie. It was weird how Hansel, Sandy's boyfriend, was talked about and alluded to but never shown. And I hate when silly fluffy movies get political. Just alienate half the audience... what a great idea! And as much as I enjoy the Hugh Grant persona, he just didn't strike me as a good catch in this movie. He was wishy-washy, indecisive, lifeless, and slutty! Why Sandy would want him after she finds him playing strip poker with his new Chief Council is beyond me. At any rate, I gave it a 6 on imdb. It was entertaining enough- although certainly not worth the price of admission--- but what is these days?
It is snowing here in Philadelphia (well, just north of). I am feeling better although my voice is getting worse. In the car going to the movie, I sang along to the radio. Burning Ring of Fire was playing and it was uncanny how much I sounded like Johnny Cash. Oh Gosh! I am coming across as so attractive... I have hairy legs and a voice like Bea Arthur/Johnny Cash! No wonder she can't get a date! All the pieces just fit into place! :-)
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Samstag, Januar 04, 2003

I went back into the donnaville archives and found my resolutions from last year. Let's see how I did!
1. My first resolution for the New Year is to stay home next New Year's Eve.
**BROKEN** I went out to a bar.

2. My second resolution is to stop obsessing over emails from Heiko (or rather the lack thereof).
I kept this resolution but mainly because Heiko dumped me.
3. The third resolution is to stop spending so much freaking money!
I guess I have kept this resolution because I don't shop nearly as much.
4. Keep my room cleaned
**BROKEN** I am a slob
5. Try to get my life in order
Yeah, I am in a better place today than I was last year.
6. Find a man to marry
**BROKEN** I couldn't even get a second date with any of the bastards I went out with but this resolution was mostly tongue in cheek.
7. Shave my legs on a more regular basis.
**BROKEN** My legs are hairier than Helena Bonham Carter's in Planet of the Apes. ;-)
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Yesterday I succumbed to a cold.... or a flu. I can never tell the difference. My body was sore, my throat was scratchy and I felt lightheaded. My voice dropped an octave or two and I wish I could say that I sounded sexy like Lauren Bacall, but a proper comparison would be Bea Arthur. I am feeling better today but not 100%.
Yesterday I found out my favorite bar closed. I don't really have a favorite bar but this one was so conveniently located at the mall. Lisa and I would go shopping and then hit the bar for a beer. Or we would go for dinner. We will miss you Kahunaville! And your strange Tiki decor! And 1.95 drafts and free Buffalo Wings on Fridays. Goodbye, forever!
Last night, as I languished in bed, I watched Mahogany! What a fabulous movie. I first saw it years ago when I was a teenager and the parts I loved then are the parts I still love today. For instance, when Diana drips hot wax all over her frighteningly skinny body as weird music plays and people cheer. I also loved the scene where Billy D Williams (Lando) and Tony Perkins wrestle with the gun. They slide all over the floor together and try to shove the gun into the other's mouth. Even as a kid I knew there was more going on than met the eye. A neighbor of mine once told me that on a plane he was seated next to Tony Perkins and the entire trip, Tony talked to himself!?!?
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Mittwoch, Januar 01, 2003

I am drinking a cup of coffee and a few minutes ago I took 2 Ibuprofen. Soon, I should be feeling fine. What had seemed like a ruined evening actually turned out pretty good. Erin and her husband Pete, Diana and her husband Dennis, Kathy and her boyfriend, and Kristen and her boyfriend showed up at the Inn of the Hawk. They are nice people and it was great seeing them.

So I am thinking about the upcoming year and trying to realize some resolutions.
Donna's 2003 Resolutions
1. Join LAFitness. Exercise, move and breath, meet people!
2. Keep room and office cleaned despite the fact there is no room for anything.
3. End the crazy cycle of Body Dismorphia.
4. When I catch a man looking at me in a bar or somewhere, I will hold his stare and smile. I will not look away quickly and wonder if there is a piece of food stuck to the corner of my mouth.
5. If the stocks I own recover, buy a townhouse and become even more unabhaengig.
6. Stop buying stupid things just because they are cheap. Realize that 50.00 is not too expensive for a pair of nice pants.
7. Stop watching so much TV, especially on Friday and Saturday nights. Get out more even if that means going out alone.
8. Sit up straight and don't fold legs underneath or one on top of the other. Stop being a contortionist. I don't want varicose veins.
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New Year. Sat at a bar with an old Autstralian man who looked like Kris Kristopherson. He told me that the "system" is inherently evil and that is why he runs safaris in Africa. he (to hell with pucntuation, I can't even feel my fingers) I lost my train of thought. How does this happen on 2 beers and a glass of champagne? Oh yeah, he reminded me of Alby Mangels, or spelled somewhat similar-- he had a show on the travel channel. ANyway, saw Erin and her friends, people that I like but I have never made any effort to become better friends. Charlie wasn't there which was a huge relief. I gotta sleep, no doubt this entry will disturb and embarrass me tomorrow. Why the heck am I at my computer and not in bed? Ugh. YEah. Happy New year.
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