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Dienstag, Dezember 31, 2002

Amish Donkey - Spank Da Monkey I spanked him at 315 miles per hour!!!!!
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Have a HAPPY NEW YEAR, everyone!!!!

...and a safe and fun NEW YEAR'S EVE!
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Montag, Dezember 30, 2002

Cool Photo "No one can resist the golden lasso. It binds all who are encircled and compels them to tell... the truth!"
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ODE TO MYOPIA
My face in the mirror isn't wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn't dirty -- the cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely, and so does my lawn.
I think I might NEVER put my glasses back on.

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Sonntag, Dezember 29, 2002

It is always something.
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I signed up for enetation comments. I am hoping they will work better than YAACS. We shall see.
This weekend I have spent hours revising my job description and writing my 2002 Performance Review. The things one must do for a raise! It is all bullsh*t. Whatever works, I guess.

TO DO LIST
1. FEDEX Package
2. Mail thank you letters and bills
3. Buy .80 stamps for letters to Silke
4. Write to guy from Chicago and VH1 Classic guy.
5. Renew PayPal account and donate money to Blogrolling and Enetation
6. Install DreamWeaver and CD Burning Software (Ha, I've been meaning to do this since I reformatted my hard drive back in October).
7. Wash towels and bedsheets
8. Put away mattress Audra used when she slept over Friday.
9. Finish Performance Review
10. Stop eating cookies and other unhealthy food. (Eat like Gwyneth-- Macobiotic, not Hostess Twinkies)
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Samstag, Dezember 28, 2002

Audra came over last night. We traded Christmas presents and drank glühwein. I got her a practical, utilitarian gift... a black tote bag. Audra, on the other hand, presented me with the greatest gift known to woman.....

(adult-sized) WONDER WOMAN UNDEROOS!!!!!

Well, I don't think they are truly Underoos but they are cotton underwear with the Wonder Woman "look." The top is a red tank with the gold belt and WW logo printed on it. The bottoms are blue with white stars. I think they must be juniors because they are not weird, fetish clothes but rather cute, retro-looking, pseudo-Underroos. COOL!
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Freitag, Dezember 27, 2002

Cool links
The German Hollywood Connection
RetroCrush
Brian's Drive in Theater
YeYe Girls
German Volkslieder
German Recipe Exchange
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Sorry about the comments, Jewdez. I figure there must be a better performing comment system out there-- I just don't know where. YAACs is down all the time and when it isn't down, it is slower than my old vic20. But then again, it's free and so I don't feel I have the right to complain.
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I am doomed! Yesterday, Barb brought me a big tin of gingersnaps, my favorite cookie. I thought I could control myself; I figured I would only eat a cookie or 2 a day. Within a second of that thought, I shoved about 50 gingersnaps down my throat. Even now, I know where they are..... I can hearing them calling me! "EAT ME, Donna!" It kills me!. You see, I resolved that after Christmas I would start watching my food intake and now it is after Christmas and all I do is shove gingersnaps down my throat!!! DAMN THAT COOKIE! IT IS THE SPAWN OF SATAN!!!!! WHY MUST IT TASTE SOOOOOOOOOO YUMMY!!!?!?!?!
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Donnerstag, Dezember 26, 2002

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas!!! Despite the funeral in the beginning of the week, we had a very nice holiday. My mom has been sick and so we didn't do much. We went to church Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve dinner consisted of peirogis, shrimp, and olly oily (I have no idea how to spell it, but it is an Italian dish of angel hair pasta with olive oil and anchovies). Then on TV, I watched Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town, Judy Garland Christmas Special, Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby Christmas Special and lastly, the Bing Crosby and Friends Christmas Special (with David Bowie). When I was younger I loved the Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town special; however, watching it last night, I was shocked at the 'evil' German stereotype. The grownups from Somberville wore WWII soldier outfits replete with helmet spike and the evil "Bergermeister" who outlawed toys and happiness was not only called, "Bergermeister-Meisterburger" but he also spoke in a heavy German accent!!! I guess that was the overriding sentiment back in 1970.
At any rate, I spent most of Christmas day eating chocolates and drinking eggnog and glühwein and playing with my Barbie Dream House..... oops, sorry that was 20 years ago.... Lisa and I went to Washington Crossing to watch the reenactment of George Washington cross the Delaware with his troops but the weather was so awful that all they did was get in to the boat and get out of the boat. Yeah, that was about it. Didn't give money to charity, didn't volunteer... spent most of the day feeling tipsy. Works for me.
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Dienstag, Dezember 24, 2002

Merry Christmas!

Fröhliche Weihnachten!


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Montag, Dezember 23, 2002

I just got back from my aunt's viewing and funeral. There weren't enough men to serve as pallbearers so my cousin asked Lisa and me if we would like to serve. Why not? So we were pallbearers. I think my aunt would have gotten a kick out of us carrying her coffin. Thinking about it, I have decided that when I die I only want female pallbearers. I figure that since men don't take me out while I am alive, I sure as hell don't want them carrying me out when I'm dead.
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Samstag, Dezember 21, 2002

Botan Rice Candy
I figured there had to be a Botan Rice candy site out there somewhere. Last night I went to Chinatown (in Philly) and had a bowl of delicious wonton soup. Afterward, I went to a Chinese grocery store and bought a box of Botan Rice candy. Instead of the usual sticker, inside was a temporary tattoo of two dalmatian dogs!?!?! I stuck it to my stomach and figured I had a good two days of shock inducing belly baring-- but sadly, the tattoo flaked away by the end of the day.
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Went to the Wine & Spirits shop and bought Christmas HOOCH! Yup, I got me some spiced red wine a.k.a. Glühwein!!!! It will taste very good, I am sure. Hopefully Audgie will visit and help me drink it. [Hint, Hint!]
Last night I was watching VH-1's I Love the 80's and the guy from the State and Viva Variety was on... trying desperately to be funny. Maybe I will see Rik Mayall on a show tonight. (Craig: My favorites were Rik and Neil and I too was shocked to see a recent photo of Bud Cort) Also on I Love the 80's, was footage from the fall of the Berlin wall; namely David Hasselhoff perched upon the wall (wearing a leather jacket that lights up), singing a song about Freedom as the crowd of Germans went wild. Gosh, I remember being so moved by images of the young East Germans in their jeans and red handkerchief headbands, standing triumphantly on the wall. Back when we were together, Herr R had given me a picture of himself from that time. He wore a jean jacket and his hair was in a long mullet; it looked like he fell right off the wall. God, I loved that picture.
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not.so.soft : mayfly project 2002
Sum up the last year of your life in twenty words or less.
Here is my entry:

Anticipation. Dumped. Changed life.
Tried online dating.
Rejection Rejection Rejection.
High School Reunion. Rejection.
Surrendered.
Overworked, underpaid.
Hopeful.

(I wanted to end it on a positive note)

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Freitag, Dezember 20, 2002

The Onion | Horoscopes Virgo: (Aug. 23—Sept. 22)
Certain shortcomings in your education and upbringing cause you to read meaning into the relationships among various celestial bodies.
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Donnerstag, Dezember 19, 2002

"wooden German Christmas Carousels that have a propeller on top and spin when you light candles on its base" = Weihnachtspyramide!!!! Thanks, Todd! (as always!)

The Young Ones.... makes me think of my youth, propped in front of the television set, watching MTV... in love with Simon Le Bon and Ricky Schroeder... the good ole days!
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Mittwoch, Dezember 18, 2002

the state all their skits, or at least most of them. Hmmm, I wonder if there is a Web site with all the eps from the Young Ones. Anyone remember them?
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Harold and Maude was on earlier and I caught about 20 minutes before I started to make dinner. Meat ravioli with tomato sauce. I do love that movie. Last night Pillow Talk was on. I love that movie too. I still have presents to buy. I want to eat roasted chestnuts and drink gluhwein. Yes, I am thirsty for warm, red wine with pieces of orange and cloves in it. I have no clue what to buy Lisa. There has to be something out there. And I keep thinking of Berlin. Not Herr R, just the city. I got a letter from my first German Gastschwester, Silke. I am so happy to hear from her. It took me 10 years to muster up the courage and reconnect with her. Glad I did. I wish I had one of those wooden German Christmas Carousels that have a propeller on top and spin when you light candles on its base. Know what I mean? I should have bought one last year.
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Montag, Dezember 16, 2002

I am angry. This last weekend I went to CVS to buy OBs. On the shelf, there was a sign that read 20 pack - 1.99. This is incredibly cheap and so I picked up 2 boxes. I went to pay and the cashier said: 8.47. "WHOA! Sign said 1.99!" She re-rang it and gave it to me for 1.99 each. Then I went to the local supermarket and ordered 3 sandwiches-- there was a sign that said buy 2 get one free. The guy rang it up as 3 separate sandwiches. "WHOA! Sign says Buy 2 get 1 free!" He re-rang it and I paid for 2. Later I went to Best Buy and there was a sign that said Masters Collection CDs 6.99 each. I grabbed a Rod Stewart Master Collection CD and brought it to the register. The guy rang it up at 9.99l. "WHOA! Sign says 6.99!" He re-rang it at 6.99.
This is REVERSE SHOPLIFTING and it sickens me!!!!! If I went to the police to report this they would laugh at me! Yet, if I stole a piece of gum they would put my butt through the ringer!
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Samstag, Dezember 14, 2002

NYPOST.COM World News: SICKO SEX CANNIBAL
B E R L I N, Dec 13, 2002 --- In a gruesome killing that could come from the Hannibal Lecter novels, a German man allegedly shared a last meal of flambéed penis with his willing victim before cutting him up and freezing his leftover body parts to eat later.
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Dienstag, Dezember 10, 2002

I made a cup of tea and then spilled it, burning my forearm. It stings. I feel stupid. I have practically ate an entire tin of chocolate cookies my mom made the other day. I can't help myself.
It was almost a year ago I left for Berlin. What a nice trip that was! I loved the Weihnachtsfests, Gluhwein, und Lumumba. I wish I could go back. Of course I was never accepted amongst the German people. Always an Ausländerin.
Well, I may not be in Germany but I am thinking of Berlin and Lübeck and remembering what a wonderful time I had...
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Sonntag, Dezember 08, 2002

Last night in Dallas, I saw Bill Cosby in concert. I snagged two free tickets and gave one to my colleague, Guillermo. The concert was only about an hour and I laughed maybe twice. I was never a huge fan of Bill Cosby although I loved Picture Pages and Fat Albert. [Mortimer the Marker & Picture pages, picture pages, now it's time for picture pages, time for games and puzzles with Bill Cosby...grab a pencil or a pen, it's time to have some fun again, it's time to watch Bill Cosby do a picture page with you! & Na-na-na, gonna have a good time, Hey, hey hey!" & Mushmouth] The one funny part during the concert was when a heckler started screaming, "Who ate my Jello Pudding Pops??!?!
The night before last I went to a Japanese restaurant called Steele. They had fabulous sushi but the waitress spilled an entire glass of Kirin down my back. Not only was I soggy but one of the people I was eating with kept stealing my sushi! It was just the oddest thing in the world to me. Carl ordered his own entree yet, without asking, he grabbed part of my meal! I said, "Yo Buddy, I don't take a bite from your hamburger, hands off my sashimi!" Strangely, he didn't seem to comprehend that what he was doing was rude and inappropriate. Some people are frustrating at times.
At any rate, I got back to Philadelphia this afternoon. It was a good trip but I am so very glad to be home.
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Donnerstag, Dezember 05, 2002

A colleague has been flirting with me. I've been pretending not to notice but I enjoy the attention nontheless. And then this evening it came out. He said, "I love Cher.... she had a concert near my house not too long ago. It was sold out by the time I tried to purchase tickets. Has anyone ever told you you look like Cher?" Yes, it has happened before; a few too many times.
Went to Landry's this evening. Practically threw away my seafood platter but ate all of the Banana's Foster. Early morning meeting tomorrow. Must sleep!
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Saw the School Book Depository. Grassy knoll seems more plausible. Ate at Dick's Last Resort-- the waitresses blew up balloon penises and gave them to all the women. Mine was an electric blue. I couldn't even get in at first. I went in with my colleagues and the guy at the door picked me out to card!?!?! I didn't have my ID, hadn't imagined I would get carded. Had to take a cab back to the hotel to fetch my ID!?!?! Unbelievable! When I got back to Dick's, everyone kept calling me "the baby." At any rate, still surviving. Must wake up real early tomorrow. How will I ever do it????
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Dienstag, Dezember 03, 2002

Cocoa had surgery yesterday and he is doing well, or so I am told. Thanks for rooting for him!
I am in Dallas and the water sure does taste funny. The hotel room is nice. And I am one of the few without a roomate. All is well.
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Montag, Dezember 02, 2002

Tomorrow I leave for Dallas, TX. Business meetings. Should be interesting.
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ABCNEWS.com : German Playboy Seeks Women to Kill Him With Sex
B E R L I N, Germany, Dec. 2 — Rolf Eden, a Berlin property tycoon, former nightclub owner, and all-purpose celebrity, says he is offering $125,000 to any woman, from anywhere in the world, who can kill him with sex.
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Sonntag, Dezember 01, 2002

The vet called. Cocoa does not have feline leukemia! He just needs to have his teeth worked on. This morning, Lily fell down the stairs. She is okay, nothing broken. Her one side is a bit sore, it seems but she is okay. How did my pets get so old!?! They are falling apart.
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