I just signed up for Verizon’s Fios service. That means a downstream speed of 15 MEGABYTES PER SECOND!!! Fiber optics aren’t just for circus toys anymore!!! Gosh, and I remember jumping for joy when I upgraded from a 14.4 modem to a 28.8!

We’re at 24 comments and my mom just jumped into the ring.

Is it no wonder I rate as the following:

I took a similar test a few years ago; I seem to be getting worse. (via Rob Booth) Goodness! Maybe George is right?

This evening after dinner, Lisa and I tag teamed a crossword puzzle. One of the clues was Peter from Peter & Gordon. “Peter A-a-a-a-h, Peter A-a-a-a-a dang it! I can’t remember!” Next thing I know, Lisa and I are singing A World without Love at the top of our lungs as I fish for the LP. Finally, I pull it out and slam it onto the record player so we can hear the scratchy vocals. “Birds sing out of tune, and raindrops hide the moon” I look on the back of the album cover, “Peter Asher! A-S-H-E-R!” Grrrrrr, so close yet….

Lisa yells out the next clue, “He sang Disco Duck” Without hesitation I reply, “Rick Dees.” Why is it I know Rick Dees but not Peter Asher? That’s just weird.

P.S. I forgot to write that on Saturday I went to a rummage sale at a church down the street and I took home the TRON soundtrack record album for a QUARTER!!!

Bobo’s back home! The poor little puppy is doing rather well considering he awoke with a cut on his belly, his testicles missing and only 2 teeth in his mouth. I am happy he is doing well but I still feel terribly guilty. It’s all said and done and we can’t go back so it’s not worth feeling guilty over.

The vet told Lisa that Bobo must stay overnight! The operation will consist of the castration, correcting his hernia and pulling some baby teeth that should have already fallen out. We will get a call at 5:00 telling us how everything went. I feel pretty confident that all will be fine. Lisa is terribly worried and spent most of the morning with our parents, crying. All we can do is wait.

Today is the day! Little Bobo will be rendered barren! I don’t want another dog. If Lisa ever moves out and takes Bobo with her and I suddenly want a Chin, I can always buy one from a breeder. Turning Bobo into a stud, although something he might like, just isn’t possible. I don’t have the time or inclination to advertise his services or even provide him with a little room to work. Castration makes sense. Besides, he is right at the stage of wanting to hump things and I would prefer to avoid that if at all possible. This afternoon he goes to the vet who will make a tiny incision in the skin just in front of his testicles. The testicles are then slid up under the skin and removed through this little slit. Lisa keeps joking she wants golf balls inserted as testicular implants so Bobo doesn’t feel impotent or suffer any psychological trauma. I sure hope she’s joking because that would really freak me out.

I awoke early and went for a walk. It surprised me that I was able to arise feeling refreshed considering I slept in both Saturday and Sunday. I thought I had to go to Chicago this week but my boss says I am fine to stay in Philly. Tomorrow we take Bobo to get castrated. I feel absolutely horrible– I don’t want to neuter him but the vet says it is the best thing to do. Certainly I do not want him out raping the neighborhood bitches but I keep thinking, maybe one day we will want him to reproduce. He is such a nice little dog, it’s a shame to end his line. No matter, tomorrow he will be a eunuch. It’s the right thing to do.

Last night was the 5th Annual Rocky Horror Picture Show performance at the Colonial Theater in Phoenixville. Audra was the lead Transsexual, Lisa and I were in the audience cheering her on. The show started at 10:00. The movie actually started closer to midnight. Those two hours were filled with me grimacing as I watched chunky women and underweight men grab each other’s genitalia and dance around in the very least seductive manner. I subscribe to the live and let live philosophy so I tried to keep my eyes closed as I waited for the movie to begin.
The gal who portrayed Janet interrupted my meditation. She asked if I would like to join them on stage for a rousing game of Duck Duck Goose. I am sure she was drawn to me because I was wearing my very sexy black and white diagonal striped dress. There was no way I was going up on stage and so I said as nicely as I could, “No, I would prefer not to do that, please find someone else.”
“Oh, it’s perfectly harmless, c’mon!”
“I said no, find someone else.”
She looked at me like I was the biggest bitch on the planet. Oh well.

The movie finally started. It was a lot of fun. The fellow who portrayed Dr. Furter stood over 7 feet tall in his black patent leather stiletto heels.

I have removed this section because reader #1 is absolutely right, I was out of line & trying too hard to illicit a laugh (and being passive aggressive along the way).

At any rate, it really was a great show! Watching it at home on DVD simply doesn’t cut it. I am sure everyone is wishing they too had joined us. Don’t worry, guys! I RECORDED IT! (15 mbs – 5 minutes) At least certain parts.

Some things to notice: During the Costume Contest, listen for my sister to say, “Vote for the guy with the man boobs!” It’s true, he had enlarged mammaries! It was the oddest thing. My camera hovers over him for quite some time so you can get a good look.

Yes, I do zoom in on the fellow who portrayed Rocky. I can’t help it, I like my men the way I like my coffee: pale, weak, bitter.

During the timewarp sequence, the reason the camera jerks around is because I am also doing the timewarp.

Enjoy the show!

It was six-thirty eight when we rounded the corner, I was angry at Lisa for taking her time getting ready and worried Charles had been waiting long for us. All was fine, he smiled when we arrived and didn’t mention our lack of punctuality.

I had given Charles a number of meeting place choices: Philly, New Hope, or Newtown. He decided upon Newtown which was ultimately a wise choice. It’s been awhile since Lisa and I were there and we were shocked at all the new shops that popped up in just a few short months. We took Charles to our favorite Newton retaurant and bar, Isaac Newton’s. Lisa and I both ordered Stella, she got the White Pizza and I got a Chicken Peanut Wrap. Charles ordered a Seven and Seven and the Pot Roast. We talked and talked. Lisa and I have decided we must go to Oklahoma City for a visit.

Bobo had been sick earlier in the day and kept vomiting up a pink substance we both agreed must have been the treats we gave him at Obedience Class the night before. Lisa was worried about him, so after walking around, we stopped at a park bench and as Charles and I talked, Lisa disappeared to pick up Bo.

Lisa arrived back a short time later with Bo on his pink and purple studded leash. People kept coming up to us asking his breed. Charles quickly got used to the fuss and began to answer back, “He’s a Japanese Chin!”

We had a great time, although one question continues to nag at me: Why aren’t there more nice gentlemen out there in this crazy world?

The photographic evidence is at the top of this entry.

I wish I had gotten the cake batter ice cream like Charles rather than the Sweet Cream. I’m definitely going back to the Zebra-Striped Whale. And no matter what ice cream I order, I will always savor the sweet memory of meeting my favorite blogger!

English is the universal language and is the primary language of business and trade. Most of the business and conversations which happen around the world are mostly in English. Hence, the European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as “Euro-English”.

In the first year, “s” will replace the soft “c”. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard “c” will be dropped in favour of “k”. This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome “ph” will be replaced with “f”.
This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent “e” in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing “th” with “z” and “w” with “v”.

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary “o” kan be dropd from vords kontaining “ou” and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.